Thursday, February 25, 2010

Capturing Hearts

I just returned from a wonderful three day seminar called "Capturing Kids Hearts". It is geared toward equipping teachers with tools to help manage their classrooms and alleviate discipline problems. The trainer was awesome. She really knew her stuff. All of the info. she gave was so valuable. Yet, if the attendees do not implement what they/we learned it will have been in vain. The seminar began with a day long of teambuilding...activities which bond the group together. This was done in order to model how important it is in a classroom to be a "team". Also, we were reminded over and over that without real, genuine care and concern for the kids we have in classrooms, then we can't really TEACH them. As Flip Flippen, the author of the Seminar states, You have to reach a kid's heart before you can reach their Head...and teach them.
I was reminded of how it is the same with PERSONALITIES. Unless you understand a person....esp. their emotional needs, you can't really LOVE them. Love includes sacrifice. That includes: time and effort. So, find out what makes your loved ones Tick....and find out what Ticks them OFF. Study them, learn to read them...then give them what they NEED. Fill their buckets with "emotional "
miracle grow, and you'll be surprised what will BLOSSOM before your eyes.

How do you do this?
Visible Clues. Watch, look, listen...

If they are loud, talkative, fun, outgoing etc. They are most likely
Playful Sanguine
Give them: Attention, Affection, Approval

If they are Leaders, risk takers, demanding, take charge. They are most likely
Powerful Choleric
Give them: Loyalty, Appreciation, Credit for hard work

If they are Detail oriented, list-makers, organizers, They are most likely
Perfect Melancholy
Give them: Sensitivity, Space, Silence, Support

If they are Laid back, not motivated, difficult to get going, relaxed. They are most likely: Peaceful Phlegmatic
Give them: Peace and Quiet, lack of stress, feelings of worth

Emotional needs are as important as air and water. A person must have them to thrive. Without the emotional needs met, a person can exist, but not THRIVE.

Friday, February 19, 2010

Thoughts to Ponder

To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting. ~e.e. cummings, 1955

He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away. ~Raymond Hull

God has given you one face, and you make yourself another. ~William Shakespeare

All my life I had been looking for something, and everywhere I turned someone tried to tell me what it was. I accepted their answers too, though they were often in contradiction and even self-contradictory. I was naïve. I was looking for myself and asking everyone except myself questions which I, and only I, could answer. It took me a long time and much painful boomeranging of my expectations to achieve a realization everyone else appears to have been born with: that I am nobody but myself. ~Ralph Ellison, "Battle Royal"

Quotes About Being Me

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Who Can Read Minds???

Anyone who is around 50 years old...(ouch!!!!) may possibly remember the "Tammy" movie...with Doris Day and Rock Hudson. In this movie Tammy is soooooo in love and at one point she sings this song that says, "I wish that I knew if he knew what I'm dreaming of"....and then it goes on to say...."Tammy's in LOVE." Well, that part of the line is not relevant to this post. lol Anyway, the point is, we really can't read another person's mind....but, we can be given "tools" that help us to "read" their personality. If we can figure out another's "personality", or "Behavioural Pattern", then we can almost begin to know what another person is thinking...and how he/she will react in various situations.

We call this technique: Using "Visible" Clues to help us identify what a person's dominate personality style is. Simply by observing how a person dresses: are they stylish, traditional, tailored, or casual. How do they interact with others? Are they the "Tell it all" type, or are they quiet and reserved, or maybe, they are the kind who "know it all" in every conversation, or maybe, they simply just observe and say nothing, but smile inwardly at all that is going on around them.

Whatever the personality one is, there is a "perferred" way of communicating. If you learn to communicate with a person on their "elevator" floor, you'll be amazed at how much more harmonious your relationships, whether personal or professional . So take the time to do a little research. Learn about your own Personality Communication Style and then learn to communicate with others according to their Communication Styles.