It was so much fun...plus an honor to get to spend with with Florence Littauer...THE MOTHER OF PERSONALITIES, in Fort Worth. This lady is truly a remarkable woman. One who is willing to share her knowledge and experience with the world, all because she cares and knows that learning about the Personalities makes such a difference in peoples' lives!!!!

I am involved in a Bible Study each Tuesday called "A Mother's Heart". It is targeted to mothers who are still in the "child-rearing" stages of their lives. Each week the mothers share their stories of triumphs...(potty training successes etc.) and tragedies (sibling rivilary etc.) More and more and more, I am convinced that in order to parent successfully, the child must be dealt with according to his distinctive personality. A one size fits all parenting style does not lead to successful, well-adjusted children. What makes one child "shout for joy" may cause another to "want to crawl under the carpet". So, I encourage you to STUDY your child...discover what motivates and what DEFLATES them...Feed their emotional garden with the proper food...(encouragement, recognition, fun, peaceful environment etc.) whatever fits them best...and watch your child GROW...as a result of what you SOW into their lives.

I had fun presenting "The Personalities" to a group of Administrative Assistants recently. I received a card through the mail expressing appreciation for the presentation. Along with the thank-you...was this quote: "I can't wait to apply the gift you gave us. My husband will be putty in my hands."
This comment was funny, but SO TRUE. Learning to communicate from the "listener's" perspective can change relationships...(for the better) almost instantly.

Perscription for Communication Success

l. Learn to identify individual
personality types by observing:

a. Visible Clues

(what you see)

b. Variable Clues
(what you observe)

2. Apply as Needed:
a. Valuable Clues (emotional needs)

3. Enjoy meaningingful communication!!!

My Sanguine self......with my Phlegmatic daughter and Choleric hubby!!!

LIFE...after the BEACH!!!

You've got to love God's sense of humor.

And he indeed has one. Why else would he have created us so differently, yet expect us to live in harmony with one another? It's like the old song lyrics, "Some days are diamonds, some days are STONE". The diamond days are the ones where we can "look beyond" the behaviors of others and "consciously" reason within ourselves why "he or she" acted "such and such" way! The STONE days are the ones where we are "paralyzed" by another person's behavior. We simply CANNOT get past the behavior...itself. It leaves us totally Frustrated, Irritated, or just plain ANGRY. It is during these times that the understanding of the personalities can save us from a lot of frustration and strife. For example...After spending a week at the beach with my daughter, her friend, and one of my friends, we return back home to Dallas. My "hunk of burning love" was left alone for the week to care for himself...all alone!!! Well, I wish he would have struggled with this plight of being LEFT ALL ALONE. But, NO!!! Guess why??? He's CHOLERIC. Cholerics are FINE....and I do mean FINE being left alone. They are totally self-sufficient. They do not need other people to "talk to". Well, after a week at the beach I was full of information that I NEEDED to tell my hubby. So, when we got home...he greeted us at the door; helped us unload the car, asked, "how was the trip?" and before I could even answer he was off to "doing his own thing".
Now, years before in my marriage I would have smoldered for days and maybe even weeks with that seemingly "lack of interest" in me, his bride. However, I now, KNOW and can PREDICT with usually 100% accuracy what his reaction will be toward me when he has not seen me for one week or one year, it will always be the same. No surprises from the Choleric!! He is just not an emotional personality...His love and interest in me is just as great as the Sanguine guy who "can't get enough" of his wife after she has been gone for a week. It just happens that I married the CHOLERIC. Besides that........He's a great provider. I never have to worry if I am going to have food to eat or clothes to wear.....unlike Mr. Sanguine who spent all of his money while his wife was at the beach!!! Uh...well, I, myself am Sanguine...and I must admit, I spent some MONEY at the beach!!! Well, my Choleric husband hasn't gotten the credit card bill yet. Maybe that can be another post for another time. Arrrrhhhhh.....I hope he remembers how sweet I am and how much FUN I had at the beach!!! LOL

School DAZE Personalities

There's no better place to see The Personalities in play than at WAL-MART.

It's time to shop for school supplies. Mom is already worn out before she gets to Wally with the kids. They rush over to the School Supply aisle...and HERE you see the REAL personality of children in ACTION.

Playful Sanguine: looks for "cute" stuff...fun, decorative cover, and bright colors...so happy to be getting ready for school....excited...chatting with others about all the "cool" items available.

Powerful Choleric: Hurry up!!! Just get it...I need PAPER, PENCILS, MARKERS...that's all...that's fine!! Let's GO....I have things to do!!!

Perfect Melancholy: Looks at every item very careful. Examines the notebooks and checks to see how many pages in each. Makes sure the pencils and the pens are the EXACT thing requested on the school supply list. Checks and rechecks to see if everything is in the basket that was on the list. Goes back and checks ONE MORE time... just to MAKE SURE...everything is PERFECT.

Peaceful Phlegmatic: Leaning on the shopping basket. Says to mother, "I don't care just get something. It doesn't matter." While mom is picking out' everything...Peaceful Phlegmatic is "observing" what everyone else is doing...and is Actually, quite Content doing so!!!

The way a person is wired "shows up" in everything he/she does. Whether it is shopping for school supplies or groceries...The REAL personality is always there...prompting the individual to: Have a good time, hurry up, being very careful and deliberate, or Who cares..WHATEVER....

Personalities at Play Today

If you've had a chance to read Being Me, Being Free, you know it deals with four distinct personality types:

• Playful Sanguine
• Powerful Choleric
• Perfect Melancholy
• Peaceful Phlegmatic

I witness these everyday -- and I'm sure you do too.

For instance, last night, as soon as my daughter Meredith got home from her summer job working at a children's camp, she was ready for a crash session. Working with those children all day drains her physically and mentally. I, on the other hand, had been home all day and was looking forward to a run to the mall. My Playful Sanguine personality allows me to go, go, go and the more I'm around people, the more energized I become. Meredith, my Peaceful Phlegmatic, needs downtime after a long period of human exposure -- aka elementary aged kids at church day camp! So what did we do? Did we make it to the mall? Did we retreat to separate rooms?

What I've learned from my years as a teacher and from my training on personality profiling, led to a compromise. Meredith got to veg out in front of the TV for a while, got a bite to eat, and refueled. After about an hour, I brought up the subject of an outing to the mall. She reluctantly relented and three hours later, when we arrived home from the mall, we were both in good moods and actually got something accomplished that she had been putting off (getting a much needed new pair of glasses)!

Moral of the story/teachable moment: Peaceful Phlegmatics must have downtime, especially after a long day at work or school. Playful Sanguines have to realize that not everyone can run like the Energizer bunny and not everyone needs human interaction 24-7. So watch out for those people in your life who need to withdraw for periods of time. It's not that they're depressed and it's not personal -- it's just how they're wired.

• Check out this Website to find out about your personality...its strengths and weaknesses. It's free!!
• OneIshy.com

My books are HERE. You can order directly from me...or online from BarnesandNoble.com, Amazon.com, or Target.com I am very excited!!! The profile pic is me along with my daughter, Meredith Grace. Meredith was the inspiration behind my book, Being Me, Being Free. She, more than anyone else, has helped me to realize we are who we are because that is how we were born -- wired!! Accepting ourselves and others for who we were created to be is very freeing, for ourselves and others. We all have strengths and weaknesses. Our goal should be to discover our strengths and work to increase them which will, at the same time, help decrease our weaknesses!!! I hope my book will inspire and motivate you and others to begin a journey of discovery about yourself and your loved ones, co-workers, and even acquaintances.

Understanding this arms you with more power to be the best you can be, along with allowing others to be who they were created to be!!!

There is a very practical quiz/checklist, at the end of the book. Have fun discussing this with your child while discovering more about him or her. There is also more valuable info at the end of the book that will provide tips for how to more effectively communicate with others so they will better "HEAR" what you are trying to say.

New Book!

Thanks for checking out my blog. My bookwas just published and is available in stores worldwide. I'm so excited! It's called "Being Me, Being Free" and is perfect for classroom or home settings. Click on the cover image in order to purchase the book at amazon.com! I'll post more soon!